54 - Merry Little Christmas

It's Christmastime, and I thought I'd share a little bit of my Christmas to all of you!

We've had this advent calendar ever since I can remember. Some of the pieces have been replaced, though...

This is my favorite Christmas decoration from my childhood. It's a little wind-up music box that has  a moving magnet so the bear looks like he's figure skating. 

Classic Christmas Village... 

Another decoration from my childhood. It's another wind-up one. 

This one and the Santa right above move when they're turned on. Also from my childhood.

My aunt cross-stitched stockings for all of my siblings when I was really little. Cool, right?

Christmas brings back so many fun memories. Our family has a lot of traditions: 

• Pajamas on Christmas Eve (a popular one, I know....)
• All the kids sleep in the same room on Christmas Eve
• Santa leaves the presents unwrapped so Christmas morning is like walking through Toyland
• My mom makes Christmas casserole (basically breakfast casserole -- eggs, sausage, cheese, etc...)
• My dad makes yakisoba 
• My dad always video tapes before we look and never fails to pretend that Santa missed our house that year
• In recent years, we've always watched some sort of Christmas movie before we go to bed on Christmas Eve. It's been Polar Express mostly. 
• There is a huge party on Christmas Eve at my Granny's house, complete with a live Nativity, a pinata, a talent show, the candy bar game, homemade eggnog, and a present exchange with all of my cousins 
• On Christmas morning, we line up youngest to oldest 
• Before our parents woke up, we would play board games to pass the time. As we've gotten older, though, that hasn't really happened because we don't wake up at 5 in the morning anymore haha
• We've recently started the tradition of a family and friend music sing-a-long where the kids perform their piano pieces and in between we sing Christmas carols. I missed that this year because I was at school :(

One of my favorite traditions around Christmastime was the luminaries around our neighborhood. Our old ward puts up white paper bags weighed down with sand and a lit tea candle around every house. It was so pretty. They have cool luminaries at Temple Square this year. 

Rachel and I went to Temple Square, too, but I'm gonna post those pictures later. 

Christmas always brings so much happiness. It reminds you how important family is and how much fun they can be. I'm gonna miss being here. I love it! 

Merry Christmas! I hope it brings you happiness and joy! 

53 - A Wonderful Life

Today I hung out at Sara's apartment with Tyler (her husband) and Nan (another sister). We ate dinner, drank hot cocoa, and watched It's a Wonderful Life.

I love Christmas.

I especially love the message of that particular movie. It got me to thinking about my life and how I affect people. I would like to think that I influence people for the better, and that if I had never been born their lives would be at least a little less happy than they are now. But it also makes me want to do better, to make myself better.

Christmas is a time for giving all of yourself. It means giving your time, and your love, and sometimes your money. Christmas is about celebrating everything that you love and cherishing it. For me, Christmas is about celebrating Christ and His greatest gift. But for those of you that believe differently, the stereotypical Christmas Spirit is a giving one.

I don't care what denomination you are or aren't. Christmas is a time for everyone. There is always someone that you have influenced for the better. There is always someone that has had life-changing experiences or feelings because of you. Maybe not in the "I just saved your life" kind of way - like when George saved his brother from drowning - but in a special way that only you could have made happen. You might not know who it is or what you did, but does that really matter? It's when you try to do things for the attention that you are doing it for the wrong reasons.

I have a challenge. Do something nice for someone, only anonymously. It doesn't have to be big. Here are some ideas:

• Write a compliment on a sticky note and stick it to the car of someone who usually annoys you 
• Scrape the windshield of your sister's car without her knowing (something I should consider...)
• If you're buying fast food, pay for the car behind you 
• Shovel your neighbor's walks after a snowstorm
• Make dinner for someone you know is having a hard time and leave it on their doorstep
• Write inspirational quotes and stick them to random doors 

There is one thing that everyone can do all the time that can always remain anonymous. And I think it helps the most.

• Pray for people you love, and people you don't. Pray to love everyone. 

I don't care if you believe in God, or not. I do. So if you trust me, do it for me. Even if you don't think it'll help, do it for me. I believe a prayer goes a long way. I've seen lives change by them, countless times over.

There is a reason it's called the most wonderful time of the year. Christmas is the one time of year that people band together and feel the same thing. They all feel that giving spirit. Christmas is about love and happiness. Christmas is about family and friends.

Christmas is realizing how wonderful your life is, and wanting to make life wonderful for everyone else.

52 - The DVD

I need to move out.

Molly already is. And tonight, things have gone too far.

A few weeks ago, Molly and I took our DVDs and put them back in our room because SOMEBODY *coughWhitneycough* had been leaving them out of their cases every single time she watched them. Today, one of my DVDs was in the DVD player. And the case was still in my room, where I left it.

She went into my room, took my DVD out of the case, and put the case back so I wouldn't notice. Then left it in the DVD player.

My DVD player, by the way. And she watched it on my TV.

I also need to mention that this same DVD was missing from my library when I moved the DVDs, and it was left on the entertainment center the next day. Which means she took it into out of the common room and into her room.

All of this without asking me. Not one word.

I'm furious. But I can't talk to her right now, because I would just do my scary yelling. That makes people cry.

I NEED to move out.

Aforementioned DVD

51 - Love Revealed

In my opinion, love is a very personal and private emotion. It's not something to be taken lightly, or to be misused. 

It's difficult for me say "I love you." That doesn't mean that I don't feel love, it's just hard for me to say because I think those words hold more power than any other phrase in existence. 

My mother used to tell me that there is always room for more love in your heart, and I find that to be true. Sometimes you don't even know there is love for something until a test of that love reveals itself. I'm here to testify that you love more people than you think. 

There are always people you love the most, and you can feel that love every time you look at them. And then there are the people you know you care about, but you're not sure if that feeling is love or simply fondness. Sometimes, those feelings don't have to separate. 

Trials come, and love is revealed. Maybe not earth-shattering, I'd die for you, 'imprinting' love. But love nonetheless. You love more people than you think. And more people love you than you know. 

Love is a very personal and private emotion. So personal and private that sometimes it takes death to show itself. 

If you get anything out of this blog post, understand this one thing: love is a gift. Love is what makes us different. Love is what connects us to other people. 

You love more people than you think.

50 - That Girl

Did you know that it's a scientific fact that current high school students have shorter attention spans than high school students who graduated as early as ten years ago? 

My AP English teacher told me that last year. She was venting about how ludicrous it was that 18 year olds couldn't even focus enough to take a three hour test. And quite honestly, it is ridiculous. Any guesses as to what's causing this? No one can know for sure, but I have a pretty educated one. 

Have you honestly gone more than one day without checking something on your computer? I don't mean times when you don't have access to the Internet, I mean times where you're at home. And the Internet is up and running. If you're a person who reads my blog regularly, I would guess no. Unless you're Sara, because she has the largest workload of anyone I know right now. Since the invention of social networks, I can guarantee that Internet use has sky-rocketed -- even more so, since the invention of smart phones. Texting, video games, chatting, TV, blogging, Skype, virtual realities... this generation constantly needs to be entertained, and it's affecting their ability to put all of their focus into one outlet. 

I am certainly a guilty party. 

Not only do I check Facebook, Tumblr, Twitter, Blogger, and my email about 20 times a day, but I also amaze myself at how much stock I put into the feedback I receive. Sometimes (and I'm pretty sure everyone does this) I post a status purely so people will comment. Something witty or unique. And when I don't get comments, it actually hurts my feelings. 

It took me a while to realize how ridiculous that is. It doesn't matter who how many comments, or likes, or profile views I have. It doesn't matter how many "friends" I have. Half of those "friends" were people I met four years ago and haven't said one word to since. Probably about ten of those friends are people I REALLY don't like, but I do know, so I feel obligated to accept their request. 

Facebook is a blessing. When my sister moves away, I'll get to see my nephew and know what's happening in his life. When my friends have a good day, I know about it - even though I live miles and miles away. It's a blessing. But like all blessings, it can be misused. It can hurt my spirit. It can damage the way I view the world. 

I removed the Facebook app on my phone and iPod. I'm going to practice self-control, and allow myself to look at Facebook once a day. Because, honestly? I don't need Facebook to reassure my self-worth. I know how many people love me. And they know that I love them. 

I don't want to be "that girl". The one who gets hurt because she notices who didn't write on her wall for her birthday. The one who uses Facebook as a personal diary. The one who can't sit down and take a three hour test without getting antsy. 

I don't want to be a girl who lives in every other life except her own. So, I'm attempting to change my course before my road even gets close to the road of "that girl". 

49 - English Major

Reasons why I'm an English major:

• I enjoy editing papers. 
• Using incorrect grammar is a good way to torture me. Or just drive me crazy and force me to correct you. 
• I say things like "Charles Dickens is the Chuck Norris of the English language."
• I would rather write essays and papers than any other kind of school work. 
• I have several journals full of long-winded passages that probably could be shortened to a sentence. 
• Reading Shakespeare literally takes my breath away. 
• In sixth grade, I was supposed to write a two page paper on Lois Lowry. I wrote six instead... 
• I want a bracelet with mini Harry Potter books on it. 
• My sister used to get mad at me for my vocabulary. (You know who you are. Hehe.)
• Dog-earing books is a hanging offense in my opinion. 
• In elementary school, I mainly read at recess. 
• Once, during the summer, I read over 2500 pages in a week and a half. I was also dead to the world...
• My sister tells me that I used to fall asleep reading, but my eyes were still open. 
• When I doodle, I doodle in words. Not pictures. 
• I often write in cursive with my finger on things I'm holding, or in the air. 
• I like writing in this blog. Sometimes I get away with myself and write too much, so people probably stop reading. I've tried to control that a bit...
• My ceiling and wall used to be plastered with quotes. 
• I've been building a personal library of my own since I was 7. 
• I was better friends with the librarian in elementary school than I was with my peers. 
• My idea of a fun date is walking through Barnes and Noble with hot chocolate and good conversation. 
• If I could, I would spend all my money on books. 
• I've been pretty apprehensive about the Kindle because I don't want my future to be a paperless one. 
• I hate to say it, but I'm kind of arrogant when it comes to English. I'm working on it...
• I think I know more than I actually do. I'm sure experience will humble me in that aspect. 

And the number one reason why I'm an English major: 

• I love words, and I think the English language can be more powerful than any weapon in the world. I hope I can spread that love and knowledge, and inspire people the way I've been inspired. Hence the reason I'm studying to be an English teacher. See this post and this post to read more about how much I love words. 

I don't know how to express how captivated I am by literature. But you all know how much I love theatre, and Charles Dickens connects the two nicely. 

"Poetry makes life what lights and music do the stage." 

48 - A Funny Thing

Birthdays are a funny thing, aren't they?

When I was little, it was this magical day that was all about me and only me. There was something special about my birthday, like I had a special glow around me for just that one day. I wouldn't be able to sleep because I was so excited, and my nights would be so restless because of all the wonderful dreams I had about the presents that I would get. 

I also had the best birthday parties when I was younger. In my family, generally the odd years were the ones that you had a friend party and the even years were when you just had a family party but with bigger presents. For my seventh birthday, we rented out the Little Gym for the whole day (which was probably only two hours haha but to my seven-year-old mind, it was the whole day). For my ninth birthday party, my mom went all out for a Harry Potter party, Sorting Hat and everything. Then we saw Harry Potter and Sorcerer's Stone in theaters. After 11, though, I didn't have many friends. And for future my birthdays, I hung out with the ones that mattered.  

Birthdays are a funny thing. 

Yesterday was that day again, for me. At 11:06 AM, I turned 19. 

I'm sad to say the magic of birthdays has essentially dissipated by the time you're 19. It's just another day, and then you remember "Hey! It's my birthday!" But the butterflies that used to keep me awake at night, the glow that used to radiate around only me -- they're gone. 

Don't fret, however. Because it's a trade-off. Blissful ignorance for maturity and experience. Pure selfishness for compassion and empathy. Expecting huge presents for expecting the ones you love to be there. 

Yes, birthdays are a funny thing. Because as I've grown older, I've just begun to understand that birthdays aren't about the presents or the money. It's about the feeling you get. That feeling that occurs when you realize how many people love you, and are glad that you were born. That feeling in your heart that makes you know you've made a difference, if only in your own small world. That feeling that makes you feel special. 

Your birthday wouldn't be a day of celebration if you weren't someone worth celebrating. 

Just remember that on your next birthday. 

:)