39 - Colder Styles

Just doing some fall browsing. I definitely don't need any new clothes, but it's still fun to look! These are some things I'm interested in...

The top two (the red dress and the wedge boots) are from an online store called Ruche. They have really cute stuff. The other items are from modcloth.com, which is a site I frequently stalk. It's fun to look at clothes, especially for winter! That sweater looks like it'd be mighty comfortable on a cold day, cozying on up with a book, blanket, and cup of hot chocolate.

38 - They Would Not Do That

I don't know how many people actually read my blog. I don't know how many of you share my faith.

I'm a very accepting person. I have many friends who are good people making bad choices. And I love them anyway. I don't like to put people in awkward situations, but I'm not afraid to tell them what I know. When I see or hear my friends denouncing what I believe, calling it blasphemy and lies, I don't shout or try to prove them wrong. Shouting never got anyone anywhere. And making people feel bad never did anyone any good. But I am not afraid to tell them what I know. Watching my friends willingly put themselves in situations that will cause them harm hurts me like I cannot describe. I hate judging people, and I hate shunning people. I hate holding grudges and I hate being angry. I hate the feeling that I get when someone that I know, someone that I like, someone who is my friend, unconsciously hurts me by attacking the core of my faith. When, honestly, they don't know anything about it. Because the people that do know about it and choose another way at least have the courtesy to respect me and to respect what I believe. Going out of your way to let me know that you think the book I consider scripture is false, and the church I belong to is a cult, is just as bad as me going out of my way to tell you that you're a sinner who's going to hell and that God has damned your soul. And if you know me, you know that I would never say that to anyone.

Having said that, this is the most powerful talk given on the Book of Mormon that I have ever seen or heard. It brought me to tears. And I truly know that it's true.

37 - Thoughtful Strangers

I saw this on the ground when I was walking to class today and I couldn't help but smile and share the love :)

I hope it made you smile!
I'm glad a complete stranger was thoughtful enough to write this on the ground, just for me. Because I like to think that it was meant for me. And now, it was meant for you!

36 -- Update

It's been a while.
Sorry about that.

I really don't have any excuse, because I am the least busy that I've been in my life. I'm pretty sure that even when I was a child I was more busy than I am now haha. The only bad thing about me getting used to not being busy is that I leave all of my homework for the last minute, so I'll have like a week of doing nothing and then a full two days of doing nothing but homework.

It's fall break on Friday. Unlike many other universities, however, we do not get a full week. Only Friday. But I'm not complaining. It's still nice to have a Friday off. :)

During this weekend, I will probably spend a lot of my time researching for big paper I have to write.

This post is more of an update than anything.

So, to updating:

It's autumn and it's gorgeous up here. I should use my spare time to take pictures with that fancy camera of mine.
Classes are going really well. They're all pretty easy. Biology, Creative Arts (which is like art appreciation... it's a general ed class), Folklore, Yoga, and English 2010. English 2010 is probably the only class that is relatively challenging. Biology I have to study for, but it's not hard at all. For both of the exams that we've had, I've felt very confident.
I'm heading up a poetry and essay contest for a festival that's going on up here in March. It was on a list of volunteer opportunities, so I emailed the guy they said to email and apparently I'm like one of the first people to volunteer because he put me in charge of something. It's for this:

Pretty cool, huh? If you want, I'll show you the flier that I made. It's about the only thing that I've done so far...
For those of you who didn't see on Facebook, I currently have a very painful cold sore. The crappy thing is that I had one on the other side of my mouth during Labor Day. I guess my immune system is making up for the fact that I hadn't had one in two years before that.
And...
that's all the I can come up with for now. Haha.
Tomorrow, for folklore, we're having class in the Logan cemetery. So that's kind of cool.
Also, I've decided to revive the phrase "Pip pip." My friends tried to a few years back. Rachel, Adri, I'm talking to you. I already have the world "blast" in my vocabulary, so I figured another proper British term wouldn't hurt. Next it'll be "Cheerio".

You think I'm kidding. ;)

Pip pip! Also, Cheerio!

35 - Breathtaking

You know when you have those moments?
The ones after those days that you just kind of feel like... bleh.
Not crappy, necessarily, but average. Normal. Like nothing new or exciting happened that day, or your routine is getting monotonous, or even though you have a really great life things just aren't working for you.
The moments that happen right when you think you couldn't be more... mediocre.
The moments when you see something that makes you realize the beauty in the world again. The blessings of your life. The moments when you realize that things are looking up.

I had one of those today.

I had an average day. It's Tuesday, so I only have one class. English 2010. It was good, I guess, just normal. Then I studied for my biology test next week, watched some TV, and got some dinner before Institute. That was also good, we had a good discussion on parables and being judgmental. Cole couldn't come because he took his friend to the ER that day and got really behind on homework because of it. As I was walking out of the Institute building, I looked around me. Grey clouds almost everywhere.

Except where the sun was setting.

It literally took my breath away. The pinks and oranges and purples all blended together to form a perfect corner of serenity and beauty in the middle of all the average grey skies.

I'm not usually one to stop and stare at a scene in nature, I'm ashamed to say. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate the beauty and all, but it never really caught my interest. There are only three times where I've really stopped to look at nature: the last time we went to Moab and climbed Delicate Arch, when I went to Hawaii and went on a sunrise walk with Sara, Jonathon, and my Dad and watched the ocean horizon, and when I went to Yellowstone and saw the Grand Tetons.

Those have all been in places acclaimed for their natural beauty. So it's no surprise that I noticed those. But right in the middle of campus, in Logan?

I think I found it so beautiful because it didn't fill the whole sky. If you looked even a little bit over, the sky was grey again. But if you looked in the right spot, it took your breath away.

I lied. There is one more piece of nature that I've stopped to stare at.

This summer I went to visit the Sacred Grove in Palmyra, NY. The spot where Joseph Smith saw the Savior and our Heavenly Father. We went at night, and the whole area was flooded with fireflies. It was like I was surrounded by stars.

You can always find something wrong with your life. You can always find something that makes it just.. bleh. But I'll bet you anything that you can find more things right with your life. Beautiful. Spectacular.

Breathtaking.

You just have to look in the right place. And sometimes, you might even need to ask for help to see.

I had to.

34 -- Test

This is just a funny picture that I found. It basically describes many of the tests I've taken in my life.

Haha. It made me laugh.

33 - WHE

So as mentioned in the last post, I've made a commitment to myself to be better. More giving. More in tune to other people.

I also made a deal with the Lord. I'm trusting that as long as I do the things I need to do, as long as I make an effort to better myself, my life will turn out the way that it's supposed to. So that means:

Read my scriptures more dutifully and intently
Pay attention in church
Magnify my calling
Be nice, even to people I don't like *coughBriancough* [Haha, just kidding, Brian :)]
Say my prayers more sincerely and often

I know that it'll make me better. And as I was about to do homework today, I looked at the clock. And realized that I can't just go most of the way. And you know what that means...

I have to go to FHE. Which is called Ward Home Evening in college wards, apparently. I've never gone. I never really liked mutual... and I was never interested in going to what is basically mutual in college.

But, I made a deal. And I want my end of it to turn out well. So, I went to WHE tonight! It was a picture scavenger hunt. We didn't win, but it was fun haha. Only one picture was taken on my phone:

Rachael (my friend) and Molly (my roommate) on the A.

I love my life, I do. But things can always be better. Especially now. And I'm hoping that by doing the things that I'm supposed to, and having complete faith in the Lord, things will be ok. You know, I'm not hoping. I know that it will be. Because I have a testimony of Christ and His blessings. He's just waiting to give them to me.

In conference, I believe it was Elder Perry that said blogging and internet communication is a good way to spread the gospel. So to whoever may be reading this, I'm a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, and I know that it's true. I have a testimony of our Savior and I know that He wants me to be happy, just like He wants you to be happy. No matter what.

So, as long as I keep up my end of the deal, He will keep His.

32 - More Less and Less Fish

It's interesting how rapidly things can change.

When I graduated high school (four months ago), I wasn't really one of those people that felt overwhelmed and young. I felt ready to be an adult and take on the world.

When I got to Utah State, I realized how young I really am. And how fast my outlook on things changed. Not just on the world, but on myself. I've always been the kind of person that thinks logically, rationally. I do things because they make sense to me and if they don't, then they're wrong. Lately, though, I've kind of come to the realization that just because something makes sense to me doesn't make me right.

I've also kind of realized that I always considered myself VERY mature. And, in a way, being mature is kind of like being humble. If you think you are, (at least at my age) you're probably not. At least not as much as I'd like to think. My feelings aren't the only ones that matter. And people aren't going to leave me just because I've hurt their feelings. And sitting around moping about it doesn't do anyone any good.

Everyone always says that college is the most selfish time of life. I know that it's understandable, but I don't want to be in that category. Being selfish doesn't really interest me. I've spent a long time thinking that if things were weird between me and someone else, they weren't gonna be there anymore. I'm tired of being paranoid that the people I love are going to leave just because of a dispute.

The people who love me are going to keep loving me. No matter what.

If someone is reading this and thinks it's directed toward them, it's not. Because, honestly, most of the people that read this will probably think it is. Really, it's directed towards everyone collectively.

You. My family, my friends, my boyfriend. You will always love me. No matter what happens. And you're not gonna leave.

So spending days nursing my feelings and thinking about all of the ways that they are getting hurt doesn't solve anything. Solving a problem means thinking about someone else. And knowing that they're thinking about you, too.

At Youth Conference one year, the leader put a bunch of clues describing Christ-like attributes around camp. One of them was "more less and less fish". "Less" and "fish" are supposed to be put at the end of the word "self". Be more selfless and less selfish. I know that I'm not a bad person. I hate hurting other people's feelings. But sometimes I don't stop to think that they don't like hurting mine either.