85 - Adventure Time

One Tuesday afternoon, I decided that enough was enough.

I'd had enough of school, I'd had enough of my room, I'd had enough of writing papers, I'd had enough of playing it safe.

I'm not a very spontaneous person... at ALL... and I thought about all the fun that the spontaneous people have. They try new things, meet new people, develop new likes... and I do the same thing. Everyday. In fact, while I was thinking about this, I was at the gym. Which is almost always where I am on Tuesdays at noon.

I eat almost the same thing everyday, do the same things everyday, and see the same people every day. I am, as they say, a creature of habit.

After I told myself that enough was enough, I went back to my dorm, packed my backpack with stuff, and got on the bus. The only thinking time I did was looking up which bus routes go to where, and I ended up at the Logan Temple. Thus began my adventure.

I sat on the bus, pulled the string when my stop came up, and got out. As it was a lovely spring day, flowers were everywhere.

I also saw a lovely view of the temple from across the street. Determined to take lots of pictures, I made my way to the temple grounds. Once there, I commenced about an hour's worth of photography. Here are my favorites:

"A Mighty Fortress is Our God"

After I took many pictures, I sat on the lawn and read for about a half hour. (Speaking of reading... Reading Riot is not finished. I merely have much catching up to do.) This is what I read:

I've read it before - about three years ago. I heard the movie was good, so I wanted to read it again. For those of you that enjoy reading in stream of consciousness, I'd recommend this book. Not all of it is in stream of consciousness, but a good portion is. Disclaimer - there are some F bombs. Luckily, I didn't read any of those while I was reading this at the temple...

Anyway. After I was finished reading, I determined to make my way to Main Street. Along the way, I (of course) took some pictures.

Everyone in Logan always asks if I'm related to the chiropractor. Well, I don't know if I am. But I found his office! 

When I was on Main Street, I wandered into an antique bookstore called Books of Yesterday...

That last one is a VERY old copy of the Three Musketeers! I wanted to buy it so bad, but alas. Not in my budget.

After the bookstore, I wandered to the old courthouse and read for a while longer.

At about 6:15, I began walking back to my dorm. I didn't really want to wait at a bus stop or find my way back to the transit center, so I just walked home from Main Street.

I was gone from 2 until 7. All by myself, walking around Logan. I got a bit sunburned, as it was probably 80 degrees outside, and my feet really hurt afterward. The only person I told was Cole, and he just told me to be safe. He couldn't come because of classes and homework.

Around 6:30, I got a text from my roommate asking if I was dead. I assured her that I wasn't, and that I simply needed... time. Time alone. (When you're living in a dorm, you NEVER get alone time.)

I needed peace, I needed an open mind. I needed to do something so wholly unlike me to see if I could really do it. And I did.

I know it's not anything big. I mean, it was just a bus ride and a long walk. But it was a step into the future for me.

My first year of college is over. I'm starting my first job in fall. I signed a lease on an apartment - my own lease. I think it's time I start taking more steps, don't you?

-ka

59 - in Disguise

As everyone already knows, life doesn't always go as expected. Oftentimes, we get thrown curveballs and strike out. However, we are always given everything that we need. When major things happen in our lives, they are definitely not simply chance. Every experience we are given shapes our lives and makes us in some way stronger, if we let it.

Sometimes trials are simply blessings in disguise. It's your job to take off the mask.

My life hasn't gone the way I've planned. In my mind, this year was going to be much different. My roommates would be awesome, Cole and I would have an infinite amount of time to spend together, college classes would be very different from high school classes, and my mom would surprise me with the car.

Like I said, sometimes life throws your curveballs.

It took me a while to realize that life really is what I make of it. It's my own fault for sitting in my apartment alone. It's my own fault for not signing up for more classes if I really felt I could. It's my own fault for not learning the bus route.

I spent a long time waiting for my life to happen, waiting for my blessings to come. I was so wrapped up in what I thought should happen that I didn't stop to think about what did happen. I didn't stop to take off the mask and see my trials for what they really were: gifts from God to make me stronger. More independent. More me.

This semester, the only thing I'm going to expect is the unexpected. I'm going to take that knowledge and combine it with an enthusiasm for life and a desire to be happy.

New semester, new goals, new year, new life.

New me.

photo from Flickr

57 - Constant State of Transition

One reason I love college:

Christmas break is nearly a month long. 

In high school, and every other pre-collegiate schooling for the matter, Christmas break is somewhere between 9 and 14 days. Plus the added bonus of at least 20 hours of homework. They're "trying to prepare you for college." And truly, much more studying and better habits are required in college. However, Christmas break in college is everything Christmas break in high school wasn't. No homework, a very reasonable amount of time off, and brand-new classes to look forward to when the break is over. It's quite lovely. 

My break is almost over, as I'm leaving for Logan tomorrow. When I first arrived back in Salt Lake, it almost felt weird. My house felt familiar, but not like the place where I lived. I occasionally woke up expecting to be back in my dorm. Now, I'm in a routine and I feel like it's my house again. Just in time for me to go back to Logan. 

When you think about it, though, it's just what college is all about: change. Learning to transition. I'm in the process of transitioning from being a child to an adult; dependent to independent; naive to experienced. Things never stay the same, no matter how much we want them to. I've had wonderful moments that were just that -- moments. Time is fleeting, and doesn't like to stand still. I'm not supposed to get "comfortable" anywhere. This period of my life is learning to adapt and change to my surroundings, and then explore new ones. Explore new boundaries, new potentials... see what mark I'm gonna make on the world. Or, at least, try to make some mini ones. 

Rocky Votolato said it best: 

Life keeps on changing

I tell it to stay still but it won't listen

I just want you near me, 

like you are now

for good. 

Life always changes, people always change. The smart thing to do is change right along with them. Change together, progress together with the people you love. Change doesn't seem so scary when there's someone with you. 

I'm in a stage of constant change. I change roommates, I change friends, I change addresses, classes, jobs,  books, callings, style... but I'm the same person. And the people I love will always be there. My family and friends will always be just a phone call away, and a short-but-not-really drive away if need be. 

Life always changes. Just be careful not to lose you during the unexpected turns. Transition into someone better, but as my mother always says, remember who you are.